Category: Uncategorized

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Would Not Do

Bloganuary writing prompt
What would you do if you won the lottery?
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There was another prompt I believe that said what would you do if you found or were given a million dollars. Lottery pay outs are much more than a million dollars, usually. It is a lot harder to say what you would not do, without saying what the alternative might be. I find it more interesting to think about what you would not too with that much money. Most Jackpots, the winner wins around 30 to 60 million or more but let’s keep it in that ballpark. I would not invest it. I would not give it to charity. I would not buy a very expensive car over 100,000 dollars. I would not buy a million-dollar home. I would not give to any political candidate or party. I would not join a country club. I would not join any type of exclusive club. I would not give it to any college or university. I would not donate to a hospital. I would not start up a business or buy a company. I would not buy any commercial property. I would not buy an airplane. I would not buy a boat. I would not defer any money. I would not make any sports bets. I would not have more than one house. I would not put in a pool. There are probably other things I would not do but for right now I cannot think of any. That still leaves plenty of things that you can do with the money, that I am not going to divulge. All of this is a moot point because I never play the lottery. Come to think of it, I worked for 44 years and never played the lottery. Let me tell you what I did do with all the money I saved. Just kidding.

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The Dwarf Dachshund

Bloganuary writing prompt
If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
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Right now, I have an 18-year-old senile cat that I wish I could make him understand anything. The good news is that he still knows what a litter pan is for. There is no question that the one pet that I wish I could have made him understand one thing, was the dwarf Dachshund I had during the late eighties and most of the nineties. We had 3 dogs at the time. A Doberman female, a male Yorkie named Casey, who was about 10 lbs. and this 4 lb. male Dachshund by the name of Wendell. They were all neutered of course, and everybody got along just fine. There was just one problem. Every time you gave the male Yorkie and a bath, this goofy Dachshund acted like the Yorkie was a female in heat and tried to hump him constantly for about 2 to 3 days. Now this was no problem for the Yorkie, because all he would do is jump on the couch, since Wendell was too small to be able to get on the couch. Wendell would just whine and cry at the base of the couch nonstop, hopping up and down. The worst part would be at night when Wendell would be in his room whining and howling all night, pining away for the dog. Needless to say, I tried everything to not have Wendell act that way after Casey got a bath. I would try different shampoos, ranging from some that really stunk to ones that had no smell. In fact, anytime a drug salesman had a new shampoo I would always tell them sure I will try that, leading them to believe that I would possibly sell this shampoo at my clinic. No, I was just trying to find one that would not make Wendell behave that way after Casey got a bath. I tried other things, too. I would bath them together. I would take Casey to the clinic, bath him about 7:30 am, not bring him home until 9 pm, but as soon as I got him home Wendell would be all over him, humping away. I took them both to a groomer to get bathed and that made no difference. It would be all over in about 2-3 days, but it was a miserable 3 days. Wendell never did this at any other time. After about a year of trying all these things, the solution was to hardly ever give poor Casey a bath. There is no question that if I could have made Wendell understand one thing, it would be that giving a dog a bath does not turn him into a female in heat.

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Changing The Time

Bloganuary writing prompt
If you could un-invent something, what would it be?
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If I could un-invent something it would be changing the time twice a year. Who thought this was a good idea? I really do not care which way we go. At first it will seem a little weird, but it won’t have near the effect that moving the clock around does, when time has not moved. If we remain on standard time, on the first day of summer, it will be light around 4 am. If we stay on daylight savings time, then on the first day of winter it will still be dark around 9 am. I think we would all adjust fine to either situation and no more fall back or spring forward bullshit. I guess 2 states Hawaii and Arizona do stay on standard time year around. Yes, Trump supporters Hawaii is a state just like Alaska. Supposedly Congress passed some law that said we would remain on the same time year around, but it got lost somewhere never to be brought up since. There is lots of evidence out there that says changing the clock the way we do does have negative effects on the physiological state of our body. Nobody seems to care, which is not a surprise. Some experts say that Daylight Savings Time does save energy. Fine, then let us just keep daylight saving time. I have heard that another solution would be to move the clocks ahead only 30 minutes this March and then keep that time from now on. That seems like a reasonable compromise. I feel fairly certain that none of this is going to happen. Newscasts will still be able to wrap things up by saying don’t forget to move your clocks tonight before you go to bed, probably for next 20 years. That will be about the length time until somebody in Congress finds that bill again.

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Clutter

Bloganuary writing prompt
Where can you reduce clutter in your life?
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Clutter is defined as a crowded or confused mass or collection. First of all, I find that an interesting definition. Most of the time I think of clutter as things or inanimate objects. How do things become confused? Is the definition stating that we are confused about what is making up the clutter. Are we confused because we don’t know how it all got there? Most clutter takes a while to really get our attention. Not a lot of us will go out to a Goodwill or similar store and buy a bunch of cheap things we do not need, dumping them in the garage and/or basement to take up a lot of space. There is no question the number one place for clutter is the garage. How many houses have you seen that have two or more car garages and the cars have to sit in the driveway because the garages are filled with clutter. The number 2 place is the basement. Then you have people that have clutter EVERYWHERE. Clutter does have a positive quality about it because it gives the people in the mental health field something to think about. Why do some people have so much clutter and they cannot get rid of it. There can be another type of clutter. Maybe this is what the question means and is even why the definition has the word confused in it. That is the clutter of the brain. I am going to give this my own cute little name by calling it clutter thoughts. Clutter thoughts seem to happen at night when you are trying to go to sleep and when you are doing something, like driving a car unfortunately, that does not require a lot of concentration. What is my answer to the question after all of that? The clutter thoughts are something that I can reduce but I do a pretty good job of that most of the time. As far as clutter objects are concerned I have practically zero, so you cannot get any lower than that. I have a few family pictures and I do have a lot of books, but they are all in bookshelves and in a nice particular order by author and type. There is one room in the basement that we will need to work on over the next two weeks. Once we get that taken care of and by continuing to meditate my clutter quotient should be just about 0.

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Golf: Mystery No. 3, Why Things Work, Until They Don’t

A thing is defined as an object or entity not precisely designated or capable of being designated. I think thing is the perfect word for what we try on the golf course to get through a round of golf. Those things may include swing thoughts, swing methods, various address positions and mental processes that we think will either get us through a round of golf or improve our golf game in general. In fact, it could be any combination of these things, that one could use to suddenly improve their ball striking abilities. Putting is an even more fickled activity. There are endless ways and techniques that are described in putting. One of the amazing things about all of this is that we are not the only ones doing all of these different things to try and improve are games. You hear about pros changing their swings all the time. They are putting one way one year and then another way the next year. Vijay Singh has won three major championships in 1998, 2000, and 2004. In each of these majors, he won with a distinctly different putting method. From this point on I will go back to calling all of this, things again, because I do not think it makes any difference which of the things we are discussing. They all have the same thing in common. They work for a while and then they don’t, so we go to a new thing. Sometimes we will go back to an old thing that we may have used years before and gosh darn it, it starts to work again. Alas, over time it quits working. Let’s take a look at each part and see if we can unravel this mystery. No spoiler alert here, we don’t but I am going to proceed anyway with lots of theories. I will look at each part, why they may work, why they quit working, and is there any alternative.

Even though I am putting all of these things under one heading there is one of these things that is a little bit different. Swing methods are more of complete swing techniques, where all the other things could be looked at as band aids or quick fixes. Ah yes, good old swing methods or systems. There have been many over the years and I am not going to mention any of them because they all suck. They are associated with some well-known instructor or player and have lots of testimonials. This is what you might call the long version of all the other things listed above. You decide to try one of the methods and give 100% to it. You practice, you make the changes in your swing, and this is what happens in any system. At first there is some back sliding. You’re getting use to new swing and pre-swing techniques, but after x amount of time and rounds, things begin to click. You feel you are hitting the ball better and your scores are even coming down some. What eventually happens is your game goes back to about the same level it was when you started the new system. You will see this with tour players when they change swing coaches. There is the period of adjustment, the supposed break through happens, but then they wind up with pretty much the same record they had with their old swing coach, over the same time period. The band aide treatments just do all of this in a much faster time frame, sometimes in the matter of a few holes. Change your grip, stand taller, stand closer, be more relaxed, change the waggle, speed up your tempo, slow down your tempo, be more rhythmic, finish in balance, swing easier, swing harder, make a full backswing, smooth transition, and finally who gives a shit. Then there is the mental game of picturing the shot, visualization, positive attitude, keeping your cool, not reacting to bad shots, playing conservatively, playing aggressively, letting go of bad shots, making the correct adjustments to the conditions, and finally who gives a shit. Like all of the methods, these things work until they don’t. They usually stop working quicker and rarely make it to the next round. These are facts Jack but why does this happen. I will be damned if I know but here are some theories that are probably worthless, but I don’t care.

We are all trying to improve, God love us, but most of these things are tried because at least in our own minds our games are actually getting worse. If we shot our handicap every time, I am not too sure we would be doing any of these things. Right now, my index is 5.7. If I shot below 80 every time, I think I would be fairly satisfied and would just go ahead and swing away without a care in the world. In my last 20 rounds I have had 6 rounds in the 80’s and one as high as 88. I have had some horrible ball striking rounds. I have tried all of the quick fixes with some really good results. I am way past trying any system. I know better than that. I feel the quick fixes work because they distract me from what is causing my horrible ball striking day. Sometimes what is causing this may not even be related to golf. Regardless, once I make a change then I get a new feel, whatever that may be, and I immediately start hitting the ball better. Now once if a while, just to make things interesting, I will do something different and continue to play poorly. I usually give it about 2 to 3 holes and then try something else. Some rounds I never seem to make any progress. Another way to look at this is to say none of these things really work, even though they seem to. Changing some relatively minor aspect of your swing should not make all that big of difference. Maybe doing something like that triggers some neurologic pathway that allows you to swing better and that in turn causes better ball striking. The reason it stops working is that this pathway had nothing to do with the poor ball striking and simply loses its effectiveness due to repetition. All of this goes against the idea that we are supposed to groove our swings, so we can repeat our swings on command. There is the adage that you can have a flawed swing if you repeat the mistake all the time. That is why you practice, to groove that swing.

There is no doubt that this is the biggest mystery of the game. It could be summed up in the following way even for the beginner; learn, success failure and repeat. If you look at tour players who have had success and then lose it, never to see their winning form return you could say the middle step disappears. For those of us who have never reached such great heights, the middle step does always happen, it just may be for a very short time. For all the things that I have done to my swing, and it ranges into the 100’s believe me, I have had a few that last a full season, but most don’t last for a week. Maybe we should just swing the way we feel most comfortable and to hell with results. Just accept the fact that you will have good days and bad days on the golf course. Sometimes the bad days stretch out over weeks. When that happens, it is extremely hard not to try and do something. Tucking my right elbow right into my side, I bet that’s the answer. What do you think? Thank God it’s January and I don’t have to think about it for the moment.

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Concepts Of A Long Life

Daily writing prompt
What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life?
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What anybody’s thoughts are on the concept of living a very long life are meaningless because we do not have a lot of choice in the manner. We may love the idea and do all the right things to live a long life according to experts and be dead at 50. On the other hand, we may not care how long we live, abuse our bodies with drugs and alcohol and live an active life into our 80’s. Just look at the Rolling Stones. The harsh fact remains that everyday someone at every age, 0 to 100, dies. You could say that death is the most fascinating thing about life. Nobody knows for sure what happens after you die. There are all kinds of beliefs and hopes that somehow our spirit or soul, or inner being will live forever. There is the belief of Heaven and Hell. Good luck with that one. Many people feel that this is it baby. You live and then you die and become nothing but elements. You decay and rot into a congealed mess that really stinks. Just look at roadkill. The most important question to ask is why. You are not going to get an answer but that is the question. Why is it that some people live to be over 90 years and others die young. There was a golfer in the mid to late 1800’s, Tom Morris. He won the British Open and so did his son Young Tom Morris to become the only father and son to win a major championship. He lived to be 86, almost 87 years old, and buried his wife and all 4 of his children. Living to be 86 in those days would be like living to 110 today. Losing all of his children, I have often wondered if he had ever wished that he would have died sooner. Living a long time can be a too edged sword to say the least. I have lived 73 years and not too far away from my 74th birthday. So far, I am able to do pretty much what I want to do when I want to do it. I have few aches and pains and can move around in a 3 story house with no problem. I am thankful every day for my abilities and my family’s good health and fortune. Even though I have no control over it, I hope I can live out my days having the same feeling that I have now. All I can do every night before I go to bed is to count my blessings and be so thankful for what I have. That is the best I can hope for when thinking of the concept of a long life.

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Could, Should, and Would

Daily writing prompt
What could you do differently?
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The prompt asks, what could you do differently? When I first looked at it, I thought it said what would you do differently, as in if you could live your life over again. A standard question asked of many famous people in the form of would you change anything if you could. Then there is the question, should you do something differently. Here are the definitions of each word. Could: The past tense of can. Can is defined as being physically or mentally able to. Would: The past tense of will. Will is defined as used to express futurity. Should: The past tense of shall. Shall is defined as to express what is inevitable or seems likely to happen in the future. Let’s look at the question using the present tense verb. What can I do differently? Well, that list could be endless, just to name a few. Eat better, sleep better, write better, golf better, be kinder, exercise more, and be less critical. All of these things I am physically and mentally able to do. What will I do differently? Well maybe about 3 of those things but I am not too sure about that. I’m old, pretty much set in my ways, and really, who gives a shit. What shall I do differently? Not a damn thing. A shitty answer to an equally shitty prompt. With the new year starting, no question, there are a lot of things I could be doing differently. Maybe when spring comes, I will be in a better mood to make some changes. For now, I am just going to plod along in my usual inept way. I should be fine, but could be better, if I would only try harder to make some changes. I think that is a little different thinking, don’t you?

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The Present

Daily writing prompt
Do you spend more time thinking about the future or the past? Why?
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You would think because I am old, I would spend more time thinking about the past. If I would hazard a guess, I would say I think about both, just about the same. There is no question that as a society we think about the future, to the point that I would call it an obsession. In fact, it is all we seem to think about. So much, for staying in the present moment. As soon as any event is over with in the world of sports there are immediate articles about who will win the next championship or will be the no. 1 draft pick next year. Who or what will, is the beginning of almost every sentence, when you read about anything related to sports. People start campaigning for office now almost 2 years before an election. Polls are taken anywhere from 18 to 24 months before an election. What is even more interesting about all these future thoughts is that we have become a society of instant gratification. If a new player gets off to a hot start over let’s say a 2-week period, then he is a future hall of famer. If another player gets off to a slow start over the same period or God forbid, even longer, then that player is a bust. Even news shows are obsessed with the short-term future because they keep telling you what is going to be shown in the next 10 to 20 minutes. Stay tuned is the number one phrase on the 6 o’ clock news now. A 90-minute newscast, between commercials, weather, and telling you what they are going to be showing you, is lucky to report on about 20 minutes of news. This obsession with the future is easy to understand. The fact of the matter is that most people think the present sucks. The future has to be better because the present can’t be any worse. Personally, I only think of the future when I am planning something. That something maybe simple like the meals for the week, or more complex like a big vacation. I only think of the past when I am looking at what I could do better or reminiscing about some good times. I like staying in and thinking about the present because that is where I am at. However, if you have a moment let me tell you about the next 30 blogs I have planned to write. The next one is titled My Life Sucks At The Present Moment.

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Someone

Daily writing prompt
What is the greatest gift someone could give you?
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The question is, what is the greatest gift someone could give you? First of all, it would depend on who that someone is? There are many possibilities. The first someone could be a complete stranger. The obvious answer to that one is money baby and lots of it. Depending on the amount, the other requirement would be they remain a complete stranger after they give it to me. They could give it to me in person, but that would be the extant of it. Now what would the amount have to be to let them at least socially become part of my life. I would say about a half a million. If you are going to hand me less than that then just beat it after you give it to me. I would take any amount also, a few thousand or whatever, but just shake my hand, I will say thank you and then turn and walk away. The next someone could be what would be called an acquaintance. Now most of the people I know, although there are exceptions, don’t have a pot to piss in. The few that I do know that are well heeled I would take money from them as long as our relationship remains the same. For my poorer acquaintances, I guess I would want them to do some chores for me. Take the car for an oil change, shovel snow, cut the grass etc. Nothing huge but just some things so I could play more golf. The next someone would be friends and relatives that are not close. The best gift would be to just continue to stay in touch and hopefully all of us will have good times with not too many bad experiences thrown in, although I know that those cannot be totally avoided. Unfortunately, things have to change but hopefully the good things will change slowly, and the bad things will happen quickly, so we can move on to more pleasant times. The final someone is my immediate family and the greatest gift they can give me they already have. I am proud of all of them and the lives they have chosen to lead. It is easy to relax and enjoy the golden years, when the people you are closest to and love, exemplify all the things that you feel make the world a better place. Thank you for the greatest gift that money can’t buy. But hey, any wealthy strangers out there, feel free.

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Pirates Morning Report: 2024 Off Season ZZzzzzzzz, Sorry To Wake You Up

To say that the Pirate off season so far has been disappointing would be an understatement. The off season is far from over and things could change, but the Pirates have done almost nothing to improve their team. The re-signing of Connor Joe I took to be a bad sign that the Pirates were not really serious about 2024. It is amazing to me how much of a positive spin that some of the media have put on the Pirate off season so far. My favorite article was titled, A Look into the Bucs’ Talented New Trio. The article was referring to Rowdy Tellez, Billy McKinney, and Edward Olivares. These individuals may have some talent, but I am not too sure that it is playing baseball. The Pirates did a little better in acquiring starting pitching, but not much. For a team that was talking about contending for a divisions title when the season was barely over, they have not shown much of a propensity for trying to obtain talent to accomplish that goal. Let’s look at what they have done so far, and I know this is hard, but try and stay awake. We are going to look at the 6 main players the Pirates have acquired during the off season. Ali Sanchez looked like he was obtained in case the Pirates traded a catcher, may have a bigger role, now that Endy Rodriguez is out for the year. We will do the players in alphabetical order because they are all pretty much mediocre, with none having much of a chance of contributing to a division title. That’s not to say that there is no hope but if history is any indication, then it will be very surprising if any of these players have a WAR of 2 or over, which means they are a major league starter.

Marcos Gonzales left-handed pitcher going into his age 32 season and the last two seasons have not been that great for Marcos. In 2022 he became a below average pitcher with an ERA+ of 90 for the first time in 5 seasons. In 2023 due to some forearm issues had to have for lack of a better description a rare surgery to decompress a nerve. After the Garcia experience of last year, the Pirates thought, sure why not, let’s get him. As in most cases with such a situation, all sides are optimistic that he will be able to pitch a complete and successful season. If he is not on the IL opening day I will be surprised.

Billy McKinney, outfielder AND first baseman going into his age 29 season and for all intent and purposes has played the equivalent of 2 major league seasons. He has a lifetime OBP of 284 and OPS+ of 82, which means he is about 20% worse than the league average hitter. Last year with the Yankees he did manage an OPS+ of 98 and got on base at a 320 clip. He is at least an average fielder which as you will see is good compared to some. There is nothing in this guys DNA to suggest that he is ready for some break out season in 2024.

Edward Olivares, outfielder heading into his age 28 season. In the last 2 years he has 559 plate appearances which is about one season of playing regularly. Just to compare, last year Byan Reynolds had 640 plate appearances with an OPS+ of 113. Olivares over that 2-year period had an OPS+ of 110, close to Bryan Reynolds, so what’s the catch. That’s the key word catch. Olivares is a terrible fielder. In 4 seasons his Defensive Runs Saved is -21. When the Pirates first signed him, I thought that might mean they were not going to sign McCutchen because here was their new DH. Seeing him in right field will be quite the adventure.

Martin Perez, left-handed pitcher going into his age 33 season. The good news about Perez is that he is under 40 and has bullpen experience. He has been at or an above average league pitcher the last 4 seasons. He is the best of this group of six players but that’s not saying much. He can definitely help this rotation and be an asset to the team. His signing has not been made official, so there is always that.

Ali Sanchez, catcher heading into his age 27 season. Sanchez has practically no Major League experience having only 14 plate appearances. He has spent 10 seasons in the minor leagues. He says his favorite movie is Bull Durham. In his four seasons at AAA he doesn’t have too bad of numbers with a batting average of .275 while slugging .402. He should get an opportunity to show something this year with Endy out for the season.

Last but certainly not least, we have good old Rowdy Tellez or should we say David Vogelbach, the Turtle part 2. Both he and Vogelbach are listed at 270 pounds. Tellez has 4 inches of height on Vogelbach to spread those 270 pounds around a little better. He is coming off an injury plaque 2023 and I have not seen or read where he is trying to get into better shape. He had the big year in 2022 with 35 home runs having 599 plate appearances. Of the free agent first basemen out there, he is definitely at the bottom of the barrel. His defense is below average and considering we had one of the best fielding 1st baseman last year in Carlos Santana, this certainly can’t be considered an upgrade.

Well, are you still awake? The Pirates did re-sign Andrew McCutchen and if he can stay healthy may see some time in the field. Right now, the Pirates do not have anybody to competently play right field, unless they use McCutchen. Obviously, the off season is not over. There is plenty of time for moves, trades, and signings to be made. For the present, the Pirates cannot be taken seriously as a franchise that is trying to win a division title in 2024.