Pirates Morning Report

FINAL SCORE GAME 1: PIRATES 2 REDS 9

WHY THE PIRATES LOSS: THE PIRATE BATTERS REFUSED TO SWING AT STRIKES WHEN IT COUNTED AND THE PIRATE PITCHERS REFUSED TO THROW STRIKES WHEN IT COUNTED. WILL CROWE HIT THE FIRST BATTER HE FACED IN THE BOTTOM OF THE EIGHTH, WALKED TWO MORE, BEFORE GIVING UP A CATCHABLE DOUBLE TO START THE ONSLAUGHT OF A 7 RUN INNING FOR THE HAPLESS REDS. THE PIRATE DEFENSE CONTINUED TO BE VERY BAD. THIS WAS A GIFT-WRAPPED WIN FOR THE REDS.

KEY MOMENT OF THE GAME: THE PIRATES HAD THE BASES LOADED AND NOBODY OUT IN THE TOP OF THE EIGHTH, WITH THE 3,4,5 HITTERS COMING TO PLATE. KE’BRYAN HAYES TOOK TWO STRIKES BEFORE STRIKING OUT ON A BALL. THE TURTLE TOOK TWO STRIKES BEFORE STRIKING OUT ON A BALL. MICHAEL CHAVIS TOOK 2 STRIKES, BUT AT LEAST THE PITCH HE SWUNG AND MISSED, WAS IN THE STRIKE ZONE. THE PIRATE BATTERS DID NOT SWING AT SIX PITCHES IN THE STRIKE ZONE WITH THE BASES LOADED. THEY DESERVED THE CATASTOPHIC BOTTOM OF THE EIGHTH.

FINAL SCORE GAME 2: PIRATES 8 REDS 5

WHY THE PIRATES WON: THEY SAVED THEMSELVES FROM THE EMBARRASSMENT OF LOSING A DOUBLE HEADER TO THE REDS BY BRINGING OUT THE LONG BALL. THEY HIT 3 HOME RUNS IN THE FIRST INNING TO SCORE 4 RUNS AND YOU COULD SAY THEY NEVER LOOKED BACK. MITCH KELLER COULD NOT PUT TWO GOOD STARTS TOGETHER AND HAS NOT BEEN ABLE TO DO SO SINCE THE BEGINNING OF 2021. BEN GAMEL ADDED A 2 RUN HOMER TO HIGHLIGHT A 3 RUN FIFTH BUT THE REDS CAME BACK WITH 3 IN THE BOTTOM OF THE FIFTH TO MAKE THE SCORE 7-5 AT THAT POINT. THE BULLPEN CAME THROUGH, THE PIRATES ADDED ANOTHE RUN IN THE TOP OF THE SEVENTH FOR A RELAVTIVELY STRESS FREE WIN.

KEY MOMENT OF THE GAME: THIS WAS NOT REALLY THE KEY MOMENT OF THE GAME, BUT IT WAS THE BEST MOMENT. WITH TWO OUT IN THE TOP OF THE SEVENTH AND THE TURTLE ON FIRST BASE, JACK SUWINSKI HIT A LINE SHOT DOUBLE DOWN THE LEFT FIELD LINE. WITH THE TURTLE HUFFING AND PUFFING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE JUST ABOUT TO RUN OUT OF WATER, HE SCORED ALL THE WAY FROM FIRST FOR ONLY THE SECOND TIME IN HIS CAREER. HIS SLIDE INTO HOME WAS PRICELESS, JUST COMING UP SHORT, BUT HIS MOMEMTUM CARRIED HIM ONTO THE PLATE, TO SCORE THE EIGHTH PIRATE RUN. IT WAS A CLASSIC.

NEXT GAME: REDS TODAY IN CINCINNATI HOPEFULLY THE PIRATES CAN WIN THE SERIES AGAINST THIS PATHETIC TEAM. LET’S HOPE THE STARTING LINE UP IS NOT WORSE THAN USUAL. ONLY THE SHELTON KNOWS. WE DO SEEM TO BE PLAYING OUTFIELDERS NOW.